Thursday, July 06, 2006

Stormy Cottage

My first night in the cottage was very stormy, both inside and out. As the rain poured outside, my tears poured inside, as I spoke with someone who had greatly changed my life in the last few weeks and months. I came to realize that although this person is a someone that I care for and don't wish ill in life, I want nothing to do with him and the pain that he caused me can start to heal. It was very refreshing actually, to speak with someone who has caused me so much pain. I never realized what I had with Marc until it was gone. And I would have never realized how messed up I was inside if it weren't for this person. A friend recently told me that some people are like leaves on a tree-they are only there for a season and a reason. This is so true. This person came into my life and my life is now in shambles. But from that wreckage I've found how important I need to be, to myself and to others, and how, although a perfect relationship doesn't exist, it shouldn't take forever to know if you are in love. Its ok to be Kate. Its going to take a while to learn that, but if this jerk hadn't come into my life and helped destroy it, I may have never found it out.

I miss Marc so much. Why does hindsight have to be 20/20? He is such an important part of my life and I'm dying inside without him.

3 comments:

~L~ said...

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Patty said...

You know what's worse? Wanting to go for a drive with Steve McQueen...he's dead! How can I get that one worked out? I don't believe in ghosts. See my dilemma!

Patty said...

As Sheryl would say...

A change would do you good
A change would do you good

Chasing dragons with plastic swords
Jack off Jimmy, everybody wants more
Scully and angel on the kitchen floor
And I'm calling Buddy on the ouija board
I've been thinking 'bout catching a train
Leave my phone machine by the radar range
Hello it's me, I'm not at home
If you'd like to reach me, leave me alone

She's so smart.