My Poor Lily-Monster (sort of a pathetic rant)

It's funny how life works out-Lily was never my favorite cat. She was my Mom's cat, her best friend, her favorite "daughter". When my mom died I couldn't bear to part with Lily so I brought her to live with me and Courtney at Purdue and she and Fernie instantly became enemies. They only band together in the dislike of others, and while they do give each other baths, it always ends in a fight. But after being bedridden with my knee surgery, Lily was by my side every second of the day, keeping me company and actually licking my tears of frustration. She and I are wildly in love these days, and I guess that's good because it seems like we're getting closer to the time in our lives where we have to say goodbye. She's really not doing well at all. She has something called "loose knees" so the back part of her walks sort of independantly of the front of her (like a bus with the accordian middle). Lately she's been struggling with the restroom, and it appears she's terribly constipated, so we've been treating that the best we can. I just feel for her so much and I'm not sure what to do. I don't believe in keeping cats alive just so they can be my friends, but it sucks because her mind is there but her little body is failing her. I'm getting especially nervous because we're about to leave her for 16 days. She'll be here at the house with a friend stopping in every couple of days, but I'm just worried that 1.) she'll think her mommy abandoned her and 2.) she'll be sick and die alone...and Fernie will freak out. I'm not crazy enough to think that I would comfort Lily if she was sick and dying, but at the same time, I don't want her to be scared or alone if she's in pain. As I sat with poor Olive several months back, I think she actually did get some peace knowing that someone was comforting her. I'm just worried. Please pray for my little sweetie. I either want her to feel better and live forever, or somehow communicate to me what she wants me to do.

I'd do anything for this kitty to keep her out of pain. Man, I already miss her and she's not even gone yet. I don't know what my life will be like without my "girls" as little Fernie is getting so old too. The joy of geriatric pets-but at least I've had this time with them.